Text

lightningrani replied to your post “I’m having a bit of a breakdown. Yeah, it was work. Yeah, I’m not…”

*sends hugs*

*hugs* Thank you.

cjwritergal replied to your post “I’m having a bit of a breakdown. Yeah, it was work. Yeah, I’m not…”

*hugs* Try to just breathe for a while. Let me know if you need or want to talk.

*hugs* Thank you. I’ll keep that in mind. Thank you.

rowanthesloth replied to your post “I’m having a bit of a breakdown. Yeah, it was work. Yeah, I’m not…”

*hugs* sorry you’re having a shitty week. :(

*hugs* Yeah. And it’s only Monday. 

dothewordything replied to your post “I’m having a bit of a breakdown. Yeah, it was work. Yeah, I’m not…”

*hugs*

*hugs* Thank you. 

Quote

"Whew! That was a close call. This episode almost had some character development in it. Well played, Moffat."

- The Last Angry Geek, reviewing Mummy on the Orient Express.
Text

I’m having a bit of a breakdown. Yeah, it was work. Yeah, I’m not doing well. I’m going to just stay in my room and starve to death slowly. I don’t care anymore. 

Photo Set

So these are some test images for a new visual novel I’m working on. I’ll be investing in a Shutterstock paid account soon, so the stamps will go away, but I just wanted to see what I could do with backgrounds that I can’t do with the CG packs I can get on DLSite.

The visual novel is tenatively titled Kaguya-Hime. It’s a branching version of the Japanese fairy-tale, Kaguya-Hime, or Bamboo Princess, and so will be a fairy-tale retold in multiple ways, all in one package.

Once I get a better idea of the structure for Kaguya-Hime, which will likely be releasable in chapters, I’ll complete setting up my Patreon for visual novels that are not as complex as games, according to the Company.

Alex in Wonderland is on the back burner because it’s a complex enough visual novel that it WILL violate my company’s non-compete if I continue working on it. There is no way I can do it without a system that looks like an inventory system, which is enough to violate the non-compete.

After Kaguya-Hime I want to work on some Vietnamese fairy tales. But Kaguya-Hime is something that both I and Xuan love, because the main character is at the very least aromantic and possibly asexual. (I am biromantic, but identify with the latter; Xuan identifies with both.)

Photo

idislikecispeople:

Hello, my name is Adele, or Kat, the latter is more of a nickname. I’m a 21 year old trans girl who also happens to be a type 1 diabetic without insurance. What is diabetes, you may ask? Diabetes is a condition that infects the pancreas that hinders/disables it from producing insulin, therefore, I have to use insulin before meals and before bedtime or else I could go into ketoacidosis, where the body experiences high a blood sugar for too long, and basic body functions begin to fail, or I could fall into a coma if my blood sugar is too low for too long. I’ve been hospitalized twice for ketoacidosis, since I was diagnosed at 15 years old, and prolonged exposure to high blood sugar can effect the body in many harmful ways, like the loss of hands or feet, kidneys shutting down, loss of vision, etc. In case you didn’t know, insulin is a very expensive, novolog, for example, is over $450 for a single vial, and lantus being around $400 a vial. I currently live with my mother and brother which helps some of the financial strain, as well as having some insulin still left over from when I had insurance, but it won’t last forever, and what I aim to accomplish with this is to save up enough money for me to be able to buy it when it does run out, so I’m starting this a little early. If anyone sees the Amazon gift card post, don’t reblog it, as I would prefer donations being put into my PayPal/bank account which both are now set up.

If you would like to donate to me to help me financially, you can donate to my PayPal by going to my blog and clicking the “donate” link, or just click here, or you can send it to megucagirl@gmail.com from PayPal itself. Even if you can only spare $1, it would help in the long to help me to afford my own insulin or to help me afford insurance which I have been denied help from the government already, and looking into private insurances. 

Please! Even if you can’t afford it, reblog and signal boost, This is very important. 

Edit: I have since been informed that there are cheaper alternatives to buying insulin, but I will have to consult with my endocrinologist further about these means, and I was only basing my research I did on a few different online sellers and from my receipts I got when I still had insurance. Even at it’s cheapest, I’ve been told, could amount to around $150 - $250 per vial, which is still expensive, considering how this is a monthly cost that I will need insulin for the rest of my life.

Again, I ask you to please consider donating. I’ve gotten off to a good start and it’s helping me feel more relieved as I’m searching to get insurance, even a $1 will help me in the long run, and if you cannot donate, then please signal boost.

Thank you, and have a good day.

(via shwetanarayan)

Source: idislikecispeople
Text

shwetanarayan:

shwetanarayan:

Once upon a time, in a kingdom in the Global South, a lovely little princess was born.  At her naming ritual, a private and sacred event,  the gathered adults blessed her with grace, thick hair, a good strong singing voice, and other princessly virtues.  Everyone was having a lovely time, when the Ambassador from Europe barged in, furious at not having been invited.

"This barbaric ceremony is just another example of your backward heathen practices," she cried. "We’re going to put you all to sleep until you learn better. Mind the thorns." She cast a handful of magically modified seeds on the ground, and they grew quickly into huge spiky thorn bushes with lovely white roses whose smell put everyone to sleep.

The thorns took over the nation, and the Europeans, armed with hankies over their noses, claimed it in the name of their queen, put the people to underpaid work, and made a tidy profit selling Exotic Sleepytime Scent and Authentic Primitive Thorn-needles.

When she was sixteen, the princess pricked her finger on a thorn and woke up.

Many of the palace people, she found, had been engulfed entirely by thornbushes, remembered only by a stray bone or poem.   But worse yet were the sleepers who still lived, stumbling around in shreds of finery and mumbling things like, “”But don’t you think we’re better off now in some ways?” and “We’d never have a needle business if they hadn’t grown all these bushes for us,” and “How pretty the roses are, so white.”  She tried to wake them, but found she couldn’t; and so she tried instead to escape.

The thorns grew even thicker and sharper around the palace than within, though, and even with princessly grace she could not evade them all. They pinned her by her skirts, her hair, her bracelets. And once they had her nice and secure, they started to grow into her skin.

She screamed.

A prince came by soon after, blonde and smiling. He said “Oh, you must be a native princess! I’ve read about your people, so noble and musical.”

"This is screaming!" she screamed.

He nodded enthusiastically. “Traditional tribal screaming, so powerful!” he said. “I shall record your music and share it with the world!”  So he did that, set her scream to a backbeat, made millions, and went on tours talking about how deeply her suffering had affected him. Since he’d never asked her name, he made one up.
 
Meanwhile, another prince came by. This one had a huge sword, which he swung around rather wildly. “I’ll save you, lovely chocolate princess!” he cried, and set about hacking at the thorns.  But his aim was not the best, and he stuck his sword right into her leg.  She screamed even more loudly.

"Oh stop overreacting," grumbled the prince. "I got my thumb pricked once and you don’t see me complaining. Stop trying to make me feel guilty about being a prince! I didn’t plant these thorns, you know."

She yelled, “GET YOUR GODDAMN SWORD OUT OF MY THIGH, ASSHOLE!”

He sniffed. “Well,” he said, “if you’re going to be so mean and rude you won’t have any allies at all will you.” And he stormed off.

The princess sagged against the thorns, worn out and bleeding.  Soon afterward a nice white lady came by.  “Oh,” she said, “your ritual scars are so cool! I’m going to dress up as a sexy thorn-princess for hallowe’en check out my ketchup blood and oh it’s okay if I do this in brownface right? Because my people are boring and civilized and don’t have a thorn ritual and I want to be accurate.”

"What," said the princess, "the everlasting fuck."

The lady replied, “Look, I’m just RESPECTING your culture, you should be flattered!”  And she flounced off.

The prince with the sword returned with a gang of friends, then, and pointed at her. “That’s the bitch who called me names,” he said.  So they all threw sticks at the princess and yelled, “How do you like it when YOU’re picked on, huh?”

Night fell. The flowers bloomed. The princess fell asleep.

The gardener’s daughter snuck over a little before midnight, a shawl over her nose and mouth, and shook the princess awake.  “Are they the foreigners gone?” she said. “We’re not supposed to interfere with the Authentic Primitive Thorn-needle business, so don’t draw attention;  but if you can keep still I’ll cut you out of there.”

The princess was too tired to do anything else, so very soon she found herself free.  The gardener’s daughter sat her down away from the roses, pulled out the thorns, and bound up her wounds with shreds of skirt.

"Wow," said the princess. "You know so much about all of this! It’s amazing, I had no idea what to do about the flowers or the thorns or anything."

The gardener’s daughter sighed and nodded. “Of course you didn’t,” she said, not without sympathy. “You’re a princess.”

—-

Note: edit at the end of October 2012: changed “they” to “the foreigners” in the gardener’s daughter’s speech, to make it unambiguous that she’s a local and avoid potential white-savior associations.

bringing this back since it’s that time of the year again when appropriation explodes over my dash more than usual

Source: shwetanarayan
Link

Angry Brown Woman Mode

shwetanarayan:

Note: I am really glad that Rochita has found the strength to post despite everything that’s been happening to her.

My perspective: outing Bee Sriduangkaew via whisper campaign was a vile act that cannot ever be defended. It was not the only vile act in this mess by a long way, and the slander against Rochita comes in a close second.

I think it’s a very telling thing about this field that, with multiple white people showing their asses extremely publicly and loudly in the recent mess, the people who have been hurt and frightened worst are all multiply marginalized people, almost all WOC.

which is why, white people, it is inherently oppressive, inherently racist, for you to insist that POC speak up about racism according to what you think we should do. You will never understand the risks we take to do so, and we can never rely on you to have our backs, so you should never be telling us when and how to do it.

Speaking of POC who have suffered from this, I’m adding a link to Polenth’s post about it.

And that’s all I’m willing to say in public, and more than I wanted to.

Source: shwetanarayan
Photo Set

little-miss-fats:

source: robot-hugs

has anyone posted this yet? I love it! 

(via cjwritergal)

Source: little-miss-fats
Text

work breather from work

I’m taking

because it’s either that or not being able to continue working later

self care ++ I guess?

Text

I know what needs to be done but my mind is like, “Why. Why are you doing this. You know, maybe the work is enough reward on its own for some people, but you are not those people. You need someone to actually say, ‘Hey, this thing you are doing? It is good.’”

And I’m crying on and off because of basically this. I have been doing days of thankless work fixing reams of incompetence that was rewarded in spite of its shittiness. No one will dare to say that I’m doing good work, because if i am, that goes against the current narratives, which I’m finding do not break in spite of large amounts of evidence to the contrary.

The only question now is, do I quit on the spot and stop the pain from seeping into my brain, or do I give notice and allow this to continue hurting me, or do I just continue because this is presumably over in the two weeks it would take me to give notice in the first place.  

I have other ideas, but they are not very good ones. 

Text

Did a good thing. Feel good. Also did good. Yays!

Now pondering doing good work things, or if brain is going to continue saying “fwwoop fwwoommp fwiddle foop fop.” 

Text

Wow so it only took one director’s ambition to completely fuck up the nice job position I got in July. I did not see myself working 12 - 16 hour days again, and the worst part is, it seems that no matter how much, hard, or long I work, it’s STILL NOT ENOUGH. 

STILL NOT ENOUGH.

NEVER ENOUGH. 

Also nobody bothered to reply to my questions about security lol. 

So I am basically reflecting on all that research I did quite recently on how to leave a job. 

Text

Work is miserable and makes me hate myself, but hey, at least I don’t have an incompetent manager.

I can’t wait for the weekend.

Every day I’m this much closer to saying FU to the tech industry.

Text

shwetanarayan:

seetobe:

shwetanarayan:

Which, Arjun did not say one word against it happening, ok?

And if the lesson you take from that is “Arjun was a hero” rather than “Wow high-caste Hinduism is fucking oppressive”, well. I have opinions about your opinion.

The only real hero in the Mahabharata is Karna. The rest of them are all douches. ALL. DOUCHES. Except no I like the mongoose too, the mongoose can stay, their point is ALSO against the for-show piety of the high castes.

There is a recent children’s movie co-made by Disney that is an adaption: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arjun:_The_Warrior_Prince - I remember it being promoted last year in many circles as an alternative to Frozen/for people to buy rather than going to see Frozen. Obviously the problems passed many by…(I haven’t seen it yet to analyse) and even more sad that it is likely the only Hindu, or even South East Asian story some of those who bought it will see…

They tend to The problems tend to pass people by (sorry hadn’t noticed how unclear that was before). I think we really really need to be asking not just “do we see POC narratives” but WHICH POC narratives do we see? And often, often, the inherently oppressive ones promoted by POC “elites” are focused on cleaning things up & brushing them under the rug for the white gaze.

And it’s like, that’s most palatable to whiteness. Oppressed brown people being Oppressed is also a theme the white gaze loves, but only when that oppression is put in terms that make the white gaze feel  good about itself? So oppressed brown girls in need of white feminism, sure. Oppressed poor brown serfs in need of western capitalism, probably.  But… groups with religious & class power being vindictive towards excellence in marginalized groups? Prooobably strikes too close to home.

Source: shwetanarayan
Text

The worst part is that even if I go to another tech company, there’s no guarantee they won’t follow the company’s example. And perhaps be even more draconian about it.